Let me give some back story here.
At 17/18 my dream had been to go to a big city (Chicago was my thinking at the time), get my degree in journalism/editing/publishing and go work at a big time magazine. Keep in mind we are talking about the mid 90's here so the idea that magazines would cease to be relevant was not even on my radar. I had been editor of my high school yearbook and unbeknownst to me at the time, we were actually doing the yearbook by coding and would get printouts hoping we had coded copy correctly. I just typed the copy I was supposed to type with the weird little codes that had been given to me on a piece of paper. I would later discover this was actually HTML code we were doing. Who knew? This further pushed my dream into reality in my brain. Young and full of optimism and hope.
Only Chicago was expensive. And far. And not really feasible. So I opted for the community college to stay near my high school boyfriend at the time. (Mistake #1) Only he dumped me over the summer so now I was stuck in my small town suburb of a small Midwest city going to my thirteenth year of high school. I opted to transfer to The University of Missouri-Columbia at semester and attempt the School of Journalism there. (Mistake #2) Only to return home after one semester because well, honestly? I was probably depressed and 18 and had no clue what I wanted or what life or love was about.
I started working at Applebee's because I broke. There I met Mark. We got married a short nine months after going on our first date (Mistake #3, I was getting good at this.). Then I began my lifelong dream of being a wife and stay at home mother. Only......that was never my dream. It was never what I truly wanted to do. Being young and never really having left home, it seemed like what a lot of people (read: women) did. Even in the late 1990's in the Midwest. (Mistake #4)
Sex and the City began airing in June of 1998. I was 21 and had been married for a year. I had quit college so Mark could finish because I was just going to stay at home once we started a family anyway. (Mistake #5) This show fascinated me. I wanted to be Carrie. In a very real way, she was what I had imagined I would be. She was living in NYC. She was a writer. She was single and just doing her own thing. She had a fabulous wardrobe, full of the designers I had come to know due to my fashion magazine addiction. She was surrounded by equally amazing, independent, fabulous women.
I watched the show. Every episode. Through the birth of my first two children. Our lives could not have been more different. I did enjoy being a mom and I felt honored to get to stay at home and raise my kids. But my husband worked long hours and I was often alone. So I clicked on Sex and the City and I escaped. To what was once my biggest dream life.
Tine went on. My kids grew up. I got divorced. I obtained a more tangible goal of being a certified teacher. Now and again I would click on Sex and the City and check out into the land of fashion and drinks and NYC.
So when the reboot was announced I thought okie dokie. I wonder what it is like to watch these women who have now moved on in life, a decade later. Especially seeing as to how I am a bit more of a bitter bitch these days. And as I stated in the beginning, I read all about it.
Here are my thoughts after watching the first four episodes and reading a lot of very negative reviews. WARNING: THERE ARE SPOILERS. IF YOU HAVE NOT WATCHED IT, STOP READING NOW.
Mr. Big: Alright. So he dies right off the bat. Now, Carrie comes home and sees him laying against the wall in the shower and does not immediately call 911. Y'all? This is not a weird thing. I think people who complained about this have never watched someone die. You simply cannot know how you will react. You are in shock. It is a very real thing. And we have no idea how much time elapsed from when we see her run to him and EMS arrive. My goodness. This was a stretch for people to get all riled up about in my opinion.
Carrie: One, lots of people keep coffee in the fridge/freezer. Supposed to keep it fresh longer some say. This is not her losing her mind. Her not focusing on conversations hours after her husband died is also not her losing her mind. This is a woman in shock and denial. Completely normal. Give it a rest. The part about Natasha? After reading some of the things I did I thought it would be one of those whiny Carrie moments. But it was actually quite touching to me. And I am dead inside. They both acted like mature adults in the interchange and I did not see Carrie being anything other than a still grieving widow operating on zero sleep. Natasha was gracious and kind and gave Carrie the answers she was seeking without even knowing.
Miranda: Does she have a drinking problem? Well the writers are trying to get us to think that. Is she questioning her sexuality? Again the writers. I have no idea where either story line is going. All I see in a 50 something year old woman trying to sort through some ideas of who and what she is. I think we call that a mid life crisis and seems to be normal, at least for men. Her biggest issue is her son who needs to learn some manners. Do I think Miranda is allowing things she never would have? Not exactly. Because she has come down on her 17 year old son. Be a mom to a teenager. It is a shit show no one handles perfectly.
Charolette: Is still Charolette. Worried about things no one else would be worried about because what others think of her is still her utmost priority. She wants everything to perfection. I was expecting to cringe a lot more with the diversity stuff. I think the show is just trying to bridge a gap that probably should have been bridged long ago. Never big on People of Color (though fully embracing different sexuality for a long time), it is time. It is relevant to today's issues and I hope they continue to explore this. And let's be honest, sometimes as the white person you approach race issues completely wrong not out of malice but out of pure ignorance.
The only conclusion I can come to is that the people writing the things I read must be much younger than me. Putting them even younger than the characters in the show. Which would make sense as to why they saw and thought differently. Is it award winning tv? Probably not. Haver they done a decent job picking up the story a decade later and tying to make it relevant to today? Yes, I think so.
What have I learned as a much older version of myself watching this show? It does not really matter where life takes you, where you live, what shoes you wear (though I still wish I had bought those Manolos back in NYC that one time), what your livelihood is: we are all humans trying to do our best in this life. Even if it doesn't always work out, look the way we think, or end the way we had hoped.
Edited to add: I do not think having my children was a mistake. They were all meticulously planned and very much wanted. While it may not have been the path I thought I would take, I am very thankful and blessed to have them. Most days. 😅
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