I've often thought about sitting down and writing over the last year. I have so many thoughts swirling in my head at any given time, I just can't always seem to get them out. So very much has occurred in the last year and a half, that most of time I don't even know where to begin.
Beginning in August of 2015, we made the decision for me to return to a paid position outside of the home. Elodie was starting Kindergarten, so all the kids would be gone all day, five days a week. The decision was made because, quite frankly, we needed some extra money coming in. After fifteen years at home and no completed degree, I was nervous and skeptical at what I would find. I wanted something contained to the same hours the kids would be gone. Something that I might actually enjoy. And I was hoping for full time. Lo and behold, my good friend Shannon put me in contact with CCVI (Children's Center for the Visually Impaired). I interviewed and was so freaking nervous. Shortly after they called with a job offer. I was to be a teaching assistant. I would be working 35 hours a week. 8 a.m.-3:30 p.m. A school schedule that matched the kids. And literally right down the street from our home. It was perfect. It did not take me long to realize that I not only loved what I was doing, but the people I was working with. It has been a huge blessing to me to be a part of what CCVI does.
As a result, in August of 2016 I made the decision to go back to college and pursue a special education degree with the intent to get my TVI (teacher of the visually impaired). Part time college classes means a long, slow road to this goal. An amazing scholarship has immensely helped in taking the steps in obtaining this goal. One semester down (and I managed to get an A in biology with lab, all online).
Shortly after I went back to work, my mom got sick. The beginning of October 2015, my mom was in the hospital. Rounds of tests were done. I don't think we ever got a definitive answer on what exactly was going on. Tumors. In her brain. The news was not good nor was it honestly hopeful. We spent a month watching mom struggle. It was by far the hardest thing I have ever had to endure. I was new at this job. My mom was dying. I tried to keep it together and keep it moving as best I could. Dad would call. My sister spent so much time helping so I could try not to miss much work. My mom had been my best friend. My biggest fan. my most loyal supporter. I had just gone back to work. My baby was only six. How in the world were we supposed to say good-bye and do life without her in it?
The decision was made to keep her comfortable. Do you know what that is like? To only be allowed to give her enough pain medicine to keep her out of pain. Mom was a trooper. And we made the decision to move her to hospice care. She didn't spend long there. In the early hours of October 31, mom took her last breath and went to be with her mama in heaven.
I think back to that time often. Kelly and I spent more time in hospitals and at our parents house than we probably ever had. We held each other up. And we held our daddy up too. I don't know how we did it. I don't know how the two of us stayed by mom's side those lest few hours. I don't know how we watched our mom take her last breath. But we did.
Daddy moved in with us after we lost mom. He has been amazing to have around. He has done a ton of work on the house. He has helped tremendously with the kids. We have been very lucky to have him with us.
See what I mean about the thoughts? Kind of a jumbled mess. Maybe I will get more out again soon....
Beginning in August of 2015, we made the decision for me to return to a paid position outside of the home. Elodie was starting Kindergarten, so all the kids would be gone all day, five days a week. The decision was made because, quite frankly, we needed some extra money coming in. After fifteen years at home and no completed degree, I was nervous and skeptical at what I would find. I wanted something contained to the same hours the kids would be gone. Something that I might actually enjoy. And I was hoping for full time. Lo and behold, my good friend Shannon put me in contact with CCVI (Children's Center for the Visually Impaired). I interviewed and was so freaking nervous. Shortly after they called with a job offer. I was to be a teaching assistant. I would be working 35 hours a week. 8 a.m.-3:30 p.m. A school schedule that matched the kids. And literally right down the street from our home. It was perfect. It did not take me long to realize that I not only loved what I was doing, but the people I was working with. It has been a huge blessing to me to be a part of what CCVI does.
As a result, in August of 2016 I made the decision to go back to college and pursue a special education degree with the intent to get my TVI (teacher of the visually impaired). Part time college classes means a long, slow road to this goal. An amazing scholarship has immensely helped in taking the steps in obtaining this goal. One semester down (and I managed to get an A in biology with lab, all online).
Shortly after I went back to work, my mom got sick. The beginning of October 2015, my mom was in the hospital. Rounds of tests were done. I don't think we ever got a definitive answer on what exactly was going on. Tumors. In her brain. The news was not good nor was it honestly hopeful. We spent a month watching mom struggle. It was by far the hardest thing I have ever had to endure. I was new at this job. My mom was dying. I tried to keep it together and keep it moving as best I could. Dad would call. My sister spent so much time helping so I could try not to miss much work. My mom had been my best friend. My biggest fan. my most loyal supporter. I had just gone back to work. My baby was only six. How in the world were we supposed to say good-bye and do life without her in it?
The decision was made to keep her comfortable. Do you know what that is like? To only be allowed to give her enough pain medicine to keep her out of pain. Mom was a trooper. And we made the decision to move her to hospice care. She didn't spend long there. In the early hours of October 31, mom took her last breath and went to be with her mama in heaven.
I think back to that time often. Kelly and I spent more time in hospitals and at our parents house than we probably ever had. We held each other up. And we held our daddy up too. I don't know how we did it. I don't know how the two of us stayed by mom's side those lest few hours. I don't know how we watched our mom take her last breath. But we did.
Daddy moved in with us after we lost mom. He has been amazing to have around. He has done a ton of work on the house. He has helped tremendously with the kids. We have been very lucky to have him with us.
See what I mean about the thoughts? Kind of a jumbled mess. Maybe I will get more out again soon....
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