Is never done, is it? There is always something more to be done, something else left to finish, someone else who needs something. Once one chore, job, task is completed, fifteen more await you.
I knew this before I even was pregnant with Alexander. I was already mom to two kids. I had been at this for a few years as well. As the kids got older, they needed me in different ways. The messes grew. The hands on time lessened. But it never ceased.
It has been overwhelming to add yet another being to care for. There was enough to occupy my day as it was. Now, add in a little one who needs to be fed anywhere from every 2 hours to every four hours, diaper changes, fussy time, and not sleeping for a good solid block of time and the every day of before is that much more of an undertaking. Turns out, the older kids still need to be fed and Emma still needs to do school, and they both need baths. The work of before has not stopped, I have just added on to it.
I also had to heal from the c-section which meant gradually taking on the daily tasks. Slowly building up over the three weeks Mark would be home. Taking on a bit more each day until I am able to run the house completely on my own again. I have tried very hard to add on little by little so as to not overdo now while I have the help.
In all of this, you must also deal with the fact that you are not yourself after childbirth. Your regular clothes do not fit (at least I can not get into mine) and having to wear maternity clothes still is a bit depressing. You are just not in your pregnant body nor are you in your normal body. You are in some state of limbo. Your emotions are raw. You just feel......off.
In order to keep from losing my mind, since it is fragile anyway, I have been reading the Bible as well as a book entitled Our Search For Serenity. I figured if ever there was a time for me to figure out how to be more serene, it was now. The other day I was reading and came across this passage:
I began to wake up to the realization that if I continued to try to live victoriously in my own strength, I could expect nothing but continued failure and discouragement. I began to see that I was expecting perfection. I was expecting more of myself than the Lord Jesus was expecting of me. I was trying to win this battle alone and was disappointed with myself when I lost. But the Lord doesn't expect us to fight alone. He says that He will go with us and fight for us..."for the battle is not yours, but God's...Ye shall not need to fight in this battle: set yourself, stand ye still, and see the salvation of the Lord..." (2 Chronicles 20: 15, 17)
Thank goodness. Because the battle of motherhood is one I simply can not fight alone. Good to know God does not expect me to. Seems God cuts me more slack than anyone else. What a blessing.....
I knew this before I even was pregnant with Alexander. I was already mom to two kids. I had been at this for a few years as well. As the kids got older, they needed me in different ways. The messes grew. The hands on time lessened. But it never ceased.
It has been overwhelming to add yet another being to care for. There was enough to occupy my day as it was. Now, add in a little one who needs to be fed anywhere from every 2 hours to every four hours, diaper changes, fussy time, and not sleeping for a good solid block of time and the every day of before is that much more of an undertaking. Turns out, the older kids still need to be fed and Emma still needs to do school, and they both need baths. The work of before has not stopped, I have just added on to it.
I also had to heal from the c-section which meant gradually taking on the daily tasks. Slowly building up over the three weeks Mark would be home. Taking on a bit more each day until I am able to run the house completely on my own again. I have tried very hard to add on little by little so as to not overdo now while I have the help.
In all of this, you must also deal with the fact that you are not yourself after childbirth. Your regular clothes do not fit (at least I can not get into mine) and having to wear maternity clothes still is a bit depressing. You are just not in your pregnant body nor are you in your normal body. You are in some state of limbo. Your emotions are raw. You just feel......off.
In order to keep from losing my mind, since it is fragile anyway, I have been reading the Bible as well as a book entitled Our Search For Serenity. I figured if ever there was a time for me to figure out how to be more serene, it was now. The other day I was reading and came across this passage:
I began to wake up to the realization that if I continued to try to live victoriously in my own strength, I could expect nothing but continued failure and discouragement. I began to see that I was expecting perfection. I was expecting more of myself than the Lord Jesus was expecting of me. I was trying to win this battle alone and was disappointed with myself when I lost. But the Lord doesn't expect us to fight alone. He says that He will go with us and fight for us..."for the battle is not yours, but God's...Ye shall not need to fight in this battle: set yourself, stand ye still, and see the salvation of the Lord..." (2 Chronicles 20: 15, 17)
Thank goodness. Because the battle of motherhood is one I simply can not fight alone. Good to know God does not expect me to. Seems God cuts me more slack than anyone else. What a blessing.....
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